How Does a Female Orgasm Work?
You may have read this from somewhere: 75% of women do not reach orgasm during sexual intercourse. The good news is that as a guy you can improve on this situation to be in the 25% that make her sexually addicted to you. This requires you to understand the 4 stages of orgasm which are as follows:
What happens when you get excited? Blood rushes to your “weapon” and it goes hard. As for women, it works in the same way, with blood rushes into her genitals causing her clitoris to swell and her vagina to increase in diameter and length. Then she will start to lubricate, that its, she gets wet. While getting excited can happen to men quickly, for women, this requires gradual escalation. The key to get her excited is to build up her anticipation and tension.
Anticipation (otherwise known as “teasing” and “excitement”) is an effective tool to get her more aroused so as to give her higher chances of achieving orgasm. The process of building up anticipation also results in cranking up sexual tension as well, which will have to be released in the form of an orgasm later.
The way to building up anticipation is to focus on the areas surrounding the main “target” before you actually go for it. For example, you can do this by stroking her inner thighs, buttocks and hips before touching her opening. While you are doing this, she will get wetter and wetter by the second, anticipating you to finally penetrate her. At the same time, the tension inside her starts building up and at some point needs to be released. When building up her anticipation, you are also building up your own too. Therefore, it is very important for you to maintain self-control and keep the escalation at the right pace.
The term plateau gives the impression that there is not a lot happening. On the contrary, there is a lot going on. Your heart rate and your breathing speed up. Blood is congested in your genitals, waiting to blow. The same also happens to her. Listen to her breathing and feel her heart rate. If you do not notice any changes, go back to step one.
Now, here is where men and women differ. At this phase, men’s arousal builds up intensely and the amount of stimulation tips over into ejaculation. In other words, this is the point of no return stage for men as he is going to come. Women do not have this. A woman can be a split second away from orgasm and it may be interrupted. She must be stimulated all the way through her orgasm.
After this, there is the Refractory Period. That is the part where men cum and definitely not going to climax again. Here again, women do not have a Refractory Period! They still remain at the Plateau Stage.
The way to cope with this is to extend the men’s “plateau” stage. This means men need to maintain their level of arousal without surging to the climax stage. Here are 2 ways to prolong the “plateau” phase:
(a) Maintain a steady tempo during penetration. Allow your thrusts to gradually gain momentum and when you feel you are fairly close to climax, slow down and if possible to withdraw entirely. Resume penetration when the arousal tapers off. Explain to your partner why you are doing this because her support and understanding is important to strengthen confidence in your performance.
(b) Try alternating between deep and shallow thrusting. Shallow penetration will stimulate the sensitive nerve endings within the first 2 inches of her “gap”. Deep thrusting will present less friction and stimulation on your organ and help you to last longer.
After the Refractory Stage, comes the Resolution. This is the stage where you have offloaded your “shots” into her and probably starts snoring away. Since women do not go through the Refractory Stage, Resolution begins once stimulation has ended. If she is sexually satisfied, her brain will be flooded with endorphins, the happiness hormone.
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